Words, words, words

As long as I can remember I have always dreamed of writing a book. I have often heard that if you really want something you will do anything it takes to get it. So I was wondering, do I really want to be an author? If yes, why haven’t I put in more effort to achieve it? Especially the last one and a half years, I have had the time and the perfect opportunity to realise this dream.

As long as I have not tried it, the dream remains a possibility. I am afraid of failing. Fear has always kept me from doing stuff. I learned how to cycle as an adult. But I postponed for years until my husband insisted quite convincingly that I learn how to cycle. I wouldn’t say that I have become a crack at cycling but I can stay on two wheels without falling down.

I have to keep reminding myself, what have I to lose? No one expects me to write a bestseller as a debut novel. In fact no one expects anything from me. But I have everything to gain, if I finally overcome my fear of failing and simply write a book.

4 thoughts on “Words, words, words

  1. I too have always felt that i wanted to write a book, and even began to make plans toward that- but really i have absolutely no flippin’ idea what I would write about- like there is nothing burning thru my brain, insisting on being written- would it be fiction? I have written a few beginnings to stories, or would it be about creativity and the soul journey, like my blog? or would it be about being a grama? I really don’t know- but I too, have always wanted to write a book… what would you write about?

    • I want to write fiction. I have a couple of plots for romance stories (how predictable) and children mystery stories. I grew up reading Nancy Drew mysteries and would love to write a book along those lines. However I find it really difficult to write about something I have not experienced and I have no experience whatsoever in solving crimes. 🙂 On the other hand, I know that I can write good non-fiction based on the positive feedback I have received for my master thesis, project report and travel blog. But I am not ready to write a book about a really personal experience. My husband’s uncle wrote his memoirs last year; just for family and friends. It is a great idea and he does have a very interesting past. Maybe that is my problem. I too am missing this burning need to tell a specific story. Maybe I need to listen keenly to my inner storyteller…

  2. yes, the inner storyteller 🙂 i think we all have stories inside of us… it is a fear thing for me too. The fear of failing, or not being good enough, of wasting the good space that a book takes up. I have dodged saying aloud “I want to write a book”. for years, and finally, i got brave- said it…said it to my husband, my 3 daughters and most notably to my sister (who is a poet). Then i set up an account with http://www.lulu.com- its a self publishing sort of place for books… and after looking thru the site became absolutely terrified! And that was where i stopped. I sort of half heartedly have looked for ways to put the book together, and i do have some visuals in my head of how it would look, but I get scared and shut myself down every time i get close to laying it all out.

    has that been your experience too?

    glad i was able to encourage you today 🙂

    • I did that too. Eventually told close friends and family that I was writing a book. I thought it would create positive pressure to finish the book. However that was about 3 years ago. Now I believe no one would take me seriously until I really finish a book. The fear of failure is one obstacle. The other is being too critical of what I have written. I go through my drafts so often that nothing much is left that I really like. Then I give up. Well, my resolution for this year is to finish a book. Keeping my fingers crossed. Maybe I’d better uncross them and start typing instead. 🙂 Wish you a wonderful week ahead, Irene

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